I *heart* yoga (but not at St Giles, apparently)

This started out as a place for me to air my weight loss woes, successes and milestones. I haven’t updated in awhile, but I’ve taken a good look at my habits over the past few months and one thing has jumped out at me. Screamed “look at me” and done the Mexican wave.

I’ve been really taken with my yoga practice lately; I’ve tried different styles over the past year, and I believe I am on some madcap search to find THE perfect yoga class. When I say perfect, I do mean perfect for me. I think perfection can come in all different shapes and sizes, and the ultimate in yoga practise for me may not be for someone else. But this is me, and I am going to put my selfish hat on and talk about what I like.

I’m not a newcomer to yoga; I’ve tried the odd class in the past, but never committed myself to a particular class or style before. I’d tried anything from a super-gentle hatha class to a very energetic, sweat-inducing Ashtanga led class. I think the only style I’ve yet to try is Bikram, but I don’t deal well with excessive heat so that may be one for the backburner. For now.

My basis for comparison is pretty high. On holiday to Toronto at the end of last summer, I was lucky enough to find an amazing yoga centre there. Octopus Garden Yoga. If you’re in Toronto I seriously recommend going there. This place is my ultimate ideal of what a yoga centre should be – unpretentious, chilled out, fabulous teachers, and a café downstairs that serves yummy muffins. Yes, they’re vegan (and no, I am not), but they smell amazing and taste as good. Let me tell you, this was the place I first fell in love with yoga.

My first teacher there was Morgan - this was back in the old location, which was much smaller and homey. The class was packed full, there was almost no space between each mat, and it was still as warm as the height of summer. Octopus Garden teaches a style of yoga called Vinyasa Flow, which I didn’t know much about. Morgan told me it was based on a kind of Ashtanga style. It shouldn’t have been as good as it was, let me just say. The full room, the heat, all those bodies. The funny thing was, I didn’t notice a thing. Once the class started, it was like everything else melted away. Now I’m one of those people who can be quite bad about people-watching. I’ll peek at folk out of the corner of my eye to see if I’m doing my moves right. In that class, I didn’t notice a single person, though I was only inches away from about 4 or 5 bodies at any time.

The other thing I noticed was my ability to go into meditation like I’d never been able to before. I’m usually the person in the corner who manages to fall asleep at the end of class, and I remember a teacher saying once that it is meditation as long as your mind is conscious. Once you slip into a state of sleep, it is just a nap. I’d never been able to successfully meditate before, and I left that class feeling amazing!

Today I tried a new yoga class, one near my flat in Edinburgh. I practise Iyengar yoga once a week at the Iyengar Centre in Bruntsfield, but our classes are on hiatus at the moment for a fortnight. I’d searched online and found Vinyasa Ashtanga yoga classes at St Giles in Marchmont, thinking it may supplement my weekly Iyengar class nicely. Hm.

The class size was small, with us all lined up in a row facing the teacher. I didn’t feel like I was in a yoga class, I felt a little like I was in a fitness class in a gym. The teacher (though I want to call her the “instructor”) called out rapid-fire poses, with almost no comments on breathing or correct alignment. Now I realise this was no beginners’ class, but I’ve been to more challenging classes where the teacher was still able to concentrate on correct execution. When it came time for the shoulder stand and she gave no instruction, and we were told to do the pose unsupported (with no equipment), I just did a back-bend instead. I’m not confident enough in my practice to do a shoulder stand without support, and I’d rather remain slightly behind the class than injure myself.
Anyhow, it was a disappointing experience. I’ll be going back next week on a different day, as I know there is another teacher who runs classes from the same location. We’ll see.

2 milestones

Milestone 1: Went to my first WW meeting in 3 years

Let me begin by saying, I went to WW religiously years ago - and I lost about 3st. I've always looked smaller than my true weight (despite being overweight and with a unhealth BMI), but my highest when starting WW the first time was 12st3.5.

I attended my first WW meeting in about 3 years, and again weighed in at exactly 12st3.5. Thatw as last Friday, and let me tell you, it was nerve-wracking. It may sound silly, but I was worried my old WW leader Maureen would be taking the meetings at the Gillis Centre (not such a stretch of the imagination, as the meetings I used to attend were in Morningside) and I'd be greeted with shocked exclamations of "what the hell happened to you? You were doing so well, and now look - you've gained it all back."

Now I know Maureen would never say that, but the worry was, would people think it? Nail bitingly nervous. I even turned up on the wrong day at first; showed up on Thursday evening and had the poor wee guy at reception double check the meeting wasn’t on that night.

I didn’t stay for the meeting (for shame!) but just weighed in; I had plans with the boyfriend and I’d promised I’d only be gone 20 minutes. Now the Gillis Centre meetings are fairly new on the WW radar, and as last week was only Week 2, I think people were just getting their bearings. It was pretty quiet in comparison to the Merlin, which suited me. I ran into a girl I recognised who works in one of the cute wee shops on Colinton Road and chatted to her for awhile. It was generally quite a chilled out experience, and to be honest no one paid the slightest bit of attention as I got weighed. It’s nice to be anonymous sometimes!


Milestone 2: Succeeded in doing a backbend in yoga

I have been going to yoga on and off (more sporadically than regularly) for years, slipping in and out of it but never really committing to anything. Which is strange, because yoga has always been something I’ve been interested in.
When I was in Toronto at the end of last summer, I had the privilege of attending classes at an amazing yoga studio in Downtown TO, called Octopus Garden. This place was everything I’d ever wanted or hoped a yoga practice space to be. It was unpretentious, and the teachers were great – I really felt like I’d learned something, pushed myself, and felt a million times better after every class. The thing was, the studio was tiny, and often the classes were so crowded there was barely a gap between students. Once the class started though, all that meant nothing, and I barely noticed how crammed the room was or how busy.

The very best thing was, I finally managed to grasp meditation. Clearing my mind has always been something I’ve struggled with, but there it was achievable.

Ever since, I have been trying to find that same space again, but for some reason I’ve never been able to at any of the yoga classes I’ve attended in Edinburgh. I’ve tried studios recommended by friends and colleagues, but they’ve always fallen short somehow.

Someone recommended Union Yoga on Rodney Street to me a few months ago, and I tried a few classes but somehow, the teachers just weren’t the right fit for me. In one Ashtanga class, the teacher, a guy called Mark, was more interested in showing off what he could do rather than concentrating on poses that would fit the abilities of the students – and there wasn’t much instruction. I did attend a Kundalini yoga class there that I really enjoyed, but it wasn’t a regularly scheduled class. It focussed mostly on breathing and on mantras, so a step away from when I think of as yoga as a fitness class.

I signed up for a full term of classes at the Iyengar yoga centre near my flat a couple weeks ago, starting from scratch at Level 1. Now I realise I’m not a total beginner, but I’ve always found there were certain poses I struggled with or glossed over in my practice, and I thought it would be useful to get the fundamentals right before tacking anything more challenging.

Today was week 3 of classes, and we attempted backbends for the first time. The first pose was Ustrasana (camel pose). I’d seen it done before, but in Ashtanga and Vinyasa practice (which I’ve had experience of before) I had never attempted it myself. I’d always thought this pose involved a leaning back, but learned today it was a lifting pose. With some help from the teacher I actually managed it!

I feel like I’m making progress, which has totally put a huge smile on my face!